Wednesday, September 7, 2011

A is for Apple

The kids have suffered a bit with getting little attention from Chris and I. Like my dad, I have a tendency to --bulldoze-- (as my mom calls it) when it comes to working on something. I just want to work work work until it gets done and be as efficient as possible while still getting the WHOLE project done right. So the job of "settling in" has taken up most of time ...or at least whenever I'm not doing immediate caregiver tasks like meals, cleaning up in-your-face-messes, naps, baths and bedtime.

Ok. Hold back. I can tell I'm giving this more detail than I intended. Basically the kids have been crazy for attention. So, this week I wanted to try to do some fun school-like activities with them. We've done a lot of things with apples since we picked boxes of them last weekend.

The boys really liked acting out the legend of William Tell shooting an apple off his son's head. We used cones for sons (since we were fresh out) and balls for arrows (but only because I didn't want to go find our arrows) and had a blast. They both actually had pretty good aim after a while.

Now this has nothing to do with apples but everything to do with Gwen being stinking cute. Remember I said she loves shoes? Today she threw a fit when I didn't put a pair of Charlie's flip flops on and didn't accept my reasoning of "you already HAVE shoes on, see? Sandals!" I gave in and put the flip flops on over her other sandals thinking she'd walk a few steps and want them off, but no. She wore them for hours that way. And it was making her walk funny. Style over comfort for this girl.

I'd like to add that most of the apple activities were done between bouts of very nearly uncontrolled anger on my part. I feel SO short of temper with the kids recently and have only enough energy for a sweet voice on the first 2 or 3 repetitions of any given phrase...after that its like I've unleashed a monster. Many people have commented about me keeping up a good attitude and I was pretty surprised to read that since I feel very NOT positive. To combat this I usually try to focus on the good things in conversations and blog posts but the marjoity of the time I'm feeling and thinking pretty miserably. Life is just hard right now. I wonder if I could see even 1 year into the future, what it would it be like?


Anonymous said...

Bahaha, style over comfort, what a girly girl Gwen is!
That shot of Charlie's aim at hte apple was AWESOME! BYU basketball team here we come!
Your moods and reactions are normal Brittney; though you may not like them. Admitting them outloud is one of the best ways to combat them. Over the past two months my daughter JAsmine has had a monster rash that won't go away. She also is pooping every 3 seconds to 5 minutes a day and my doctors have not been very helpful. She screams bloody mruder all day long and clenches her cheeks and its impossible to get her fully clean, even when she's taking baths and showers. She screams during the night and wakes up her little brother; its just horrific. She's not my little girl anymore. I have been having the same reaction of anger to my kids too. I know I am not going through nearly as much as you but I thought I'd mention because you are not alone. There are mothers all over the world going crazy and getting angry because of challenges in their lives that are almost impossible to control. So we have admitted it and have ourselves a little group.... "Hi, I'm Lana and I get mad at my children." What's next?

Shelly Beth said...

Hi, I'm Michelle and I get mad at my children. A lot. I think it it totally normal and the good thing is that we recognize it and want to change. I still haven't mastered the "how do I not loose my temper" thing. If you find the secret, let me know. I think that is one of the hardest things for me right now, bot getting angry with my children. Could it be their age!?! Anyways, I remember when I was 1 day, 2 days, 1 week, 2 weeks overdue with Aubree everyone kept saying how positive I was about everything. I remember thinking, "What, you think I am positive!?!" I guess we can put up a good act for a while. But, I DO think it is very theraputic to let it all out and tell people how you really feel. Not only does it make you feel more honest with yourself and like a step in the right direction, but I feel that sometimes when you open up like that it allows other people who are feeling the same way to open up and share with you too. Sometimes you and they can get strength from each other. I think of you often, Brittney. I hope things start improving soon!

Jess said...

so cute!

and guess what? you are normal! I act like that with my kids most days and I'm not going through everything you are! If you are trying and praying for guidance things will improve. It is super super hard. I find that I'm usually backtracking, but I'm trying :) we sure love you and I hope we get to see you when you come down for your quick trip!!

Radene said...

Brittney, as always I love to read what is going in your life and all your efforts to continue being the wonderful mom that you are. I so appreciate your honesty too because I often feel the same. So many good intentions and plans...and if the kids could just cooperate!! And listen the first time... even the third time...wouldn't that be a miracle? ha. Anyway, Thanks for sharing. WE love you!

katricew said...

I realize I haven't been in touch as often as I should. I didn't realize the difficulties of Canada and with three children under the age of 5, I think the first thing to do is breathe, secondly give yourself some credit for balancing so much and third find some time to give yourself a warm bubble bath? I realize with the limited time constraints giving yourself time is near impossible (as I have found here in Nigeria), but even that moment or few moments I run as fast as I can to a bed and sleep. You'll love yourself afterwards.